Wednesday, June 29, 2011

I Wish I Were "Liked" More

I have been wanting to write about this topic for some time now and it wasn't until today that I finally had a good reason to. Social Media is great don't get me wrong but it has some very large pitfalls that I think have the potential to put people on the wrong track, both temporarily and permanently.

Some personality types need the constant reassurance from "friends" to keep their self-esteem high enough to operate normally in life. This isn't always bad, like when you have people close to you and get to have the physical relationship as well as the emotional. This type of self-esteem building is natural and we as a human race have had many decades to get used to this sort of interaction, it's natural. With Social media however you don't get the physical part of the relationship. You don't get to read physical queues or see the look in someones eyes that often times scream out silently to you for help or understanding or even assuredness. I feel like we are losing this all together and although social media like Facebook and Twitter weren't the original offenders they are rapidly propelling us in that direction now.

This is important to me because I know people like this and have had the social media pleasure of being knocked aside in lieu of more self-esteem building opinions. This is especially disconcerting because this incident was with a person that I feel has only me to show her the opposite viewpoint giving them information that can be used in the decision making process. Years have gone by where I have been that person and sometimes my side of the coin has persuaded and sometime it hasn't but not until today has it been entirely rejected without a full hearing. This upset me a bit because I consider this person a good friend and would always listen to what they had to say.

So there is my soap box and I just wanted to get it out there. Social media is good but when used for the purpose of keeping in touch with people. Not, making decisions based on what your Facebook Friends think because most of them are just using social media to keep in touch with you and not as a decision making tool. They aren't placing value in what they are telling you. You can't place value on advice given in 140 characters or less.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Empty House

Haven't posted in a while but really want to get back in the habit of doing so. On Thursday morning I took my Wife and Son to the airport and saw them off to go visit her mom. This is the first time in a few years that me and her are apart, 1st time since we have been married. This is also the first time I have been apart from my Son since he was born over a year ago. The thing about this is that I thought it would be weird but didn't expect it to be the way it really is. I feel so lonely without them here and have really been going stir crazy being at home alone. I really can't wait to see them again and although we have been able to Skype each other I really want to kiss my wife and hold my Son again. I guess this confession isn't really a "manly" thing to do but I think that men go through life trying to be manly and end up missing out on real depth of feeling. This is the only way I know of to portray to myself just how much someone means to me in my life.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Will you marry me?!

I finally asked my girlfriend to marry me! A little over a year ago I started looking for rings and thinking about how I wanted to do it and yesterday I pulled the trigger on my plans. Here is how the night went. I told her that I wanted to take her out to a restaurant, Petterinos, that we go to every once and a while so that it wouldn't seem out of the ordinary. I called a taxi and they never showed up, so I had to call another one which finally showed up but made us 30 minutes late for our reservation. It was ok because the restaurant wasn't to busy (no good shows in town) and were seated right away. We ordered our food and after the main course Fatima starting to not feel well, which then caused me to start sweating bullets, but ultimately she starting feeling better so we pushed on with desert and decided to go for a walk. The walk was planned ahead of time as a way to get us to the next part of my 3 part plan. We walked down a few blocks and on the way I mentioned that it was a beautiful night and that we should do a carriage ride. She thought this was a very nice idea as well and so we walked to the old water tower on Michigan ave where all the carriages start from. I went up to the driver and asked how much and after he told me I started to get out my wallet and told Fatima to go ahead and get in the carriage. When she was out of ear shot I asked the driver if he could take a route that went by Lake Michigan and ended on Ontario and Michigan which was were part 3 of the plan would commence from. So, we started our ride and and took some pictures and a short video (posted on my Face Book account) and when we got in front of the Lake and in sight of Navy Pier I popped the question. Here is what I said: "When I first saw you I felt a connection, the second time I saw you you gave me the finger and told me "your not getting any of this", the 3rd time I saw you, you spilled wine all over my jeans and we took a carriage ride and I fell in love with you! Fatima Noda, will you merry me?"! She said yes and made me the happiest person in the world at that moment in time! This is where I asked her:

View Larger Map

I asked the driver to take a photo of us and we continued on as we talked about our future and commented on what had just happened and how beautiful the evening was. We approached our destination and Fatima and I were discussing how much we wished we were already home when I said "I don't know if I can wait to get home!" She looked at me confused, especially when I started to get out of the carriage before we had actually come to the end of the ride. She asked what I as doing and I told her that we were staying at the Allerton Hotel tonight and not going home! She was very surprised! So we went up to our room, I mean Suite, where I surprised her again with flowers, candles, and rose pedals on the you know what! (other stuff happened) We got up and relaxed with a nice breakfast and then went home where we called all of our family members to spread the news! All in all I think it went pretty well! We are very excited about all the great things we have in front of us!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Life... Like a box of chocolates..

I found out today that a very good friend of mine is having relationship issues and as a result has called off his upcoming wedding. Now, you might say this is a good thing because at least he found out these things (whatever they may be that are big enough to call off a wedding for) before he said "I do" and got his receipt (marriage license). The difference here is that they have a little girl waiting to enter the world and my friend really wants to do the right thing and make a family for the new addition to grow up with. Now, this sentiment of getting married just because there is a child involved might be a shade old school, but I think that you have to try and make it work as best you can and that's exactly what my friend is trying to do. Unfortunately, it sounds like no compromise is coming from the other party involved. So, now what happens? Well, like in most other situations, we get the lawyers involved and pay them money we don't have so that we can argue our points to a neutral third party to be the decider on what should happen with the new life that is or has entered this world. I really hope things get better for my friend, he is a great guy and deserves to be happy. This is a sad story, I hope it has a good ending..

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

O'Hare Airport manditory delay..

Waiting on my sister's flight to arrive from Philadelphia. It was already going to be in kinda late, like midnight, but now it has been delayed till 12:53. So, I am here at home tracking it via Pretty cool website, gives you pretty up to date info about the flight in question and you can even have alerts sent to you mobile phone via text. They also have a pretty nice mobile site (with a lot of ringtone links). It is amazing the things we are able to do these days. I remember when you had to make plans with people and keep them because once you left your land line phone there was no way to get a hold of them. I think that all this tech is great and in a way freeing you to explore, but do you think that it is also having the negative effect of making people less responsible and creating some serious reliance? I don't know for sure but I do know that every time some one says to me "let me see whats going on" or "I want to keep my options open" when I am trying to put together a get together I want to scream WTF and perhaps some other choice superlatives. Anyway, I guess what I am trying to say is people have become so free that now they are becoming A-holes and enough of an A-hole that they will basically say to your face that they are holding out for something better to do, but might come if nothing comes up.. That's just wrong..